by Elsbeth Martindale, Psy.D.
This product offers individuals a unique method of examining partnership. Each card contains an essential question important to ask when entering or deepening a relationship.
A deck of 76 powerful questions to ask before you give your heart away.
Boxed set includes: 192 page book and a deck of 72 cards. This product offers individuals a unique method of examining partnership. Each card contains an essential question important to ask when entering or deepening a relationship.
Cards can be sorted into piles based on varying questions or intentions, such as:
What information matters most to me in a romantic relationship?
How does my current love interest match up with my values and desires?
Why did my last relationship fail? What did I neglect to understand?
Do I have what it takes to create a healthy relationship?
What do I want my daughter or son to understand about partnership choices?
By examining the cards and answering the 76 questions, you enter into a very personal and extraordinary exploration of values, desires, and limits. You will discover how much you know or don’t know about your expectations for future, current, or past relationships. The cards will stir deep dialogue with another person and/or they can be used in personal contemplation and reflection. No matter how they are sorted, explored, or discussed, these cards are sure to lead you to new knowledge about yourself and your relationships.
The accompanying book explains the importance of each question and areas for future exploration. The cards and book are packaged in a sturdy box for use over and over again.
Just had an opportunity to use your cards with 16 year old today. She was totally delighted and wanted to get her own set! I read pertinent questions to her, she answered, then read back of card aloud--leading to great discussions. Then she went through the deck, picking questions that attracted her. She is excited to do more next week! Bravo to you!
Beth Quackenbush, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist, Salem, OR
(The Things to Know Before You Say “Go) cards ... were very well received by my community college women in transition students. Also a great gift for your teen daughter who thinks the Twilight vampire books depict a desirable, healthy romantic relationship.
Shoshana D. Kerewsky, Psy.D.
Counseling Psychology and Human Services
University of Oregon, Eugene, OR
(This is) a great book & card set that you can use with the client to help with decision-making, learning about the factors that go into healthy relationships. I've used the set now with several clients, and I'm really liking it. Because you can use it in session, it takes the burden off the client regarding reading skills (clients who have poor reading skills also have low incentive to read for between-session homework -- it's arduous, they don't feel comfortable with it, etc.).
Susan Rosenzweig, Psy.D
Clinical Psychologist, Portland, OR
I received your cards and book yesterday, and sat down to see what you have been up to. I had them about half an hour, when my daughter (age 20 and not in a relationship) took them from me. Soon they were spread over the kitchen table and she was writing down all the questions that she really liked. She said, “These are really good question. Has she written any other sets of cards?” Naturally I gave them to her, and will order another set for me. I hope she takes them back to college with her, shares them with her friends and they all start talking about these important questions.
Therapist, Washington DC
Just want to mention that I am referring multiple clients to your cards. They cover a very pertinent women's issue (well 'everyone's issue) but it seems proportionately women rush to love, lose boundaries and get in over their head before sorting it out, at great personal expense to themselves. This is the perfect material to refer numbers of people to in just such a juncture... The best thing about the deck is the wisdom, honesty and truth integrated all throughout.
Jessica Burnet, Aspen, CO
I like that they are tactile. I especially enjoy the fact that I can nip away at them here and there, drawing a card at random and seeing what it brings up, for me as well as for my daughters. I like the option of sorting them into piles for what I know about myself. I like sorting them into piles about what I know about my child. I like going through them in retrospect as far as past relationships were concerned and seeing where there were strong points as well as where the problems were... sort of learning in retrospect. I like seeing why my committed marriage works when I go through the deck. It validates that these work. I love the idea of my daughters using them with me, with themselves and with their friends as they get older... when they move from friendship to more serious dating, to relationships and on to commitment. It's so nice to have a visual thing that is not strictly a book... something you can shuffle up, put a few in a pocket, draw one of more at random. They are so much more versatile than a worksheet or a teaching guide with a binding. They can even be used for social occasions, where you set a card at each person's place, to start conversation.
I would highly recommend this deck to others. I would recommend this deck, whole heartedly to single people looking to make good choices in finding a mate, to young people wanting to have true friendship and honest relationships from the get go. I'd recommend it to counselors who can use it with their teen and adult clients. Oh, if we'd only had this deck when I was growing up.
Tave Fasce Drake
Artist and Educator, Portland, OR
I just used the "Things to Know Before You Say Go" card deck today with a single male client who was uncertain about how serious he was in a new relationship. He found it helpful to sort out what was important and what was not and to recognize the qualities he was seeking in a committed, long term relationship. I plan to use it with a couple next. A useful tool!
Peter A. Powers, Ph.D.
Clinical Psychologist, Eugene, OR
192 page book and a deck of 72 cards.
Stock: 1-2 business days!